Good news and bad news

The good thing is that I will be returning to crafting and focus on my art. Bad news is don't know when I will be next online due some bastard keeps fiddling with the router. First of all you can play MMo after 7pm and now it's like there some uncertainty as if there is any new updates in Kitsu Saga anyway. I have reached the lv cap and within top 100 of celebrities, god of war and slayers ranking. I have my even have my own statue and one of the strongest in my class. Regain my confidence the kind of stuff my so called family should of given to me instead of comparing and ass kissing. Since I'm not allow to vent my frustration out of anyone else I'll harm myself well I have been feeling emo for 4 days now. Only person who understands me is the hamster he doesn't like anyone else I'm the only person prepare to care from him. I can tell when he is hassled because moves the bedding and find some where else to sleep.

Rafa is getting old he will 2 years in 2 months time. I wonder what emo hamster uses to self harm itself probably wire or plastic in the cage. Art is one of few things to keep me going besides keeping a journal, I don't have the right environment for art journalling no studio and no peace and quiet. I always have to move my stuff with me because not my room any more even though my stuff is in there. The one thing I'm doing is tatting because helps to focus on now like a form of grounding. Crochet and tatting needs focus otherwise it is too easy to go wrong, mistakes can be corrected but in real life there's too much attention in getting things right first time so stressful. Those morons could say the same with my art that not achieving anything. Normally when I'm stressed I use my art to channel my art but how can I if don't get any peace. Right now I have 2 choices either quit playing MMos completely or play less. Buy me PS3 then I'll quit MMos completely.